When someone says, “I don’t have anything to talk about“
Throughout my career, I have noticed that there can be resistance to being told to go to supervision. With a common response being “I don’t have anything to talk about.”
Often this statement comes from people who haven’t engaged in supervision before and don’t know what to use it for, but also I think it speaks to an unspoken belief that stopping to reflect takes us away from ‘doing the work’.
When I first started my counselling training, we were required, and believe quite rightly so, to engage in both personal counselling and clinical supervision. When our lecturers would remind us of this requirement, the response would be, “What do I talk about if I don’t have any clients yet?”
Translation: “If I don’t have clients, then I’m not doing anything.”
The response our lecturer gave us has stayed with me nearly twenty years later:
“You could talk about how it feels to not have clients yet.”
My interpretation was that exploring what you are experiencing is essential to being able to sit with and support clients to do the same. And looking back, maybe it makes sense to start practising this as soon as possible rather than wait for a client issue to arise.
Supervision isn’t just about client issues; it is about you.
What is going on inside you. How you are responding to not just clients but also your colleagues, your manager, the information you are taking in, the systems, policies, frameworks and institutions you are working in. Basically how you are existing and developing as a professional in a role that involves deep human interaction, and let’s be honest here, working with oppressive systems that don’t just impact your clients; they impact you too.
I also think the statement “ I don’t have anything to talk about” can be translated another way.
“I don’t have anything I feel safe talking about without feeling judged.”
Professionals are humans, and the fear of judgement is a very common human feeling. Perhaps this is a challenge to managers, supervisors and teachers to really understand how scary vulnerability is.
And this is exactly why good supervision is so important.
Supervision needs to be a place where those scary conversations can happen, without judgment but still with accountability.
I want the people who come to me for supervision to gain insight into what they are doing well, remain inspired and excited about the work, and to feel less alone.
Because if we aren’t experiencing places where we can feel like this, how can we do the same for others?
Tracey Wakefield 